A lil story

14 Sep

It’s just another frigid New England Friday night. The slushy gray mud-snow covers everything, but at least the winds are not at skin-piercing levels. Didn’t go skiing with everyone else for the weekend because, as it turns out, unemployment leads to a depletion of one’s bank account. It’s 9:30pm and I refuse to spend my night watching television and listening to my middle-aged neighbors have sex (I imagine they played a lot of 7 Minutes in Heaven when they were young, because that’s how long the sex always lasts). This is not how I envisioned life as a young, independent, college graduated adult. I was encouraged to take charge of my life and carve out my future. So far, all I’ve carved out is a nice and warm dark spot on my IKEA couch, compliments of my ass.

My friend Janette is usually as broke as I am, or at least she says so. We’ve been friends for a while and she hasn’t made any large enviable purchases during this time, or given me any reason to believe she might be investing on mutual funds and/or saving for a house. I’d be pretty pissed if she is because I plan on counting on her friendship when I am officially recognized as a bona fide loser – which, by my calculations, will come around age 34. But that will be then, and this is now, and now I digress. We’re broke, but we’re never too broke for a couple of drinks. We agree that she’ll pick me up and we’ll head to Down Under, an aptly named, ill-lit basement that is all the rage with the cool (read: attractive) kids this winter. Partly because the DJ knows what the girls like and partly because the options are THAT limited in Cambridge.

Once I get off the couch, it’s a race against the clock: shower, shave, style hair, moisturize body, moisturize face, tan body, tan face, prime face, makeup, fix eyebrows, quick coat of nail polish, accessories… fuck, which shoes?? The only thing I’m not worrying about tonight is the dress. It is a good luck charm and has delivered the right amount of elegance and sex to land me two highly enjoyable nights on the town. I’m banking on the third time being the charm for bigger and better things; pairing it with my new thigh high boots, I’ve created a visually transmitted message written in man-code.

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3 Responses to “A lil story”

  1. mschatz03 April 13, 2010 at 22:19 #

    “Once I get off the couch, it’s a race against the clock: shower, shave, style hair, moisturize body, moisturize face, tan body, tan face, prime face, makeup, fix eyebrows, quick coat of nail polish, accessories… fuck, which shoes?? ”

    It must be hard being a woman.

  2. Matt April 14, 2010 at 07:26 #

    Must be tough being a girl. I just kind of wake up and go.

  3. Juliana April 14, 2010 at 10:22 #

    sometimes it is, boys, which is why i often skip all that and get harassed by my family for not being “feminine.” i prefer sanity.

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