This sucks, thanks for reading

26 Apr

I’m pretty fucking angry. I’m angry because I’ve forgotten how to write. Or how to entertain myself while writing. And I’m now a certified lame-o for boo-hooing about my writer’s block when I’m not even a goddamn writer to begin with. I’m just a chick with a blog.

I’m also pretty fucking angry at how shallow I am sometimes. I choose to twirl my hair and think about how much I enjoyed being sexually harassed by a New York City bartender instead of working on an overdue spreadsheet. I click on the Lindsay Lohan throws glass at girlfriend’s head headline before reading what Stephen Hawking thinks about our attempts to communicate with aliens. And fuck it, yes, I go to the gym because I want to be healthy and live a long life, but more than that, it’s because I want a really hot body.

I’m angry because I’ve yet to begin researching the fourth dimension theory that is so imperative for the brilliant sci-fi thriller that’s in my head. I read a little here and there, but the info I want is inside books found at the library. The library where I owe $60 in lost titles. They aren’t lost, really, they’re just somewhere in my apartment. My apartment that is perpetually messy, since I’ve decided not to clean until it’s time to start packing for my move. My move into the new place I’ve yet to measure out to ensure I can bring all of my furniture. All the furniture I’ll probably end up selling in order to get brand new stuff because I’m a spoiled brat who spends on furniture and tattoos when she should be saving her money with a credit union that is less likely to fuck her over if financial reform doesn’t pass or gets pissed on by republicans, thus enabling irrational booms to plummet a decade from now, wiping everyone else’s savings except for mine.

I’m angry when I read the disgusting lies uttered by republicans trying to shut down the financial reform bill. Bull-fucking-shit such as claiming government should simply allow banks to fail, that existing derivatives contracts should be exempt from new regulations, that the proposed bill will hurt the markets beyond repair… are you confused?

So am I. But I’m not confused enough to know that we will NEVER allow banks to fail within our existing system, where they’re too powerful and hold too much of our money without any backing. Because if we did let them fail, the fuckers at the top would wipe their hands clean and take their business elsewhere, while Americans scramble through another recession. And do you know what derivatives are? If I’ve got an apple, you and I are gonna bet on the FUTURE VALUE of that apple. If my apple’s worth $5 or more in 2015, you pay me $1. If it’s worth less, I pay you $1. That’s how these institutions make money. Does that sound like some crazy game made up by a four year-old? Yes, it does. But did you know it’s a HUGE market that is largely UNREGULATED? Did you know that Warren Buffett himself once called derivatives “weapons of financial distruction?” Did you know that one of the measures republicans want to stop is of forcing these institutions to set aside their own bailout money in case of severe loss in their derivatives investments? Doesn’t that sound like it makes sense? Well, the republicans don’t think so. Apparently their outrage at bailing out the banks one year ago was… for show. To rally the American people against the democratic president and gain support for themselves and their money grubbing friends.  Who would’ve thunk?

I’m angry that people like the Arizona governor exist and that she has supporters who somehow can rationalize the legalization of racial profiling, abuse of power, and violation of civil rights. I’m angry that a guy like John McCain, who once seemed like a good dude, has actually supported this law because he’s so happy that this shit is happening under Obama’s watch and may score a few conservative votes now that he’s left behind Palin’s dust.

But mostly I’m just angry I can’t just burp a blog post like I was doing two weeks ago. Hopefully my writing class starting next Thursday will get the juices flowing again. Either that or I haven’t been watching enough porn.


14 Responses to “This sucks, thanks for reading”

  1. Martin April 26, 2010 at 22:41 #

    Not bad at all for “writers block.”

    Republicans suck. I have been absolutely disgusted by their words and actions since the President was elected…actually, well before that, but this has been ridiculous. They would far rather court future votes than actually try to help people in this country, and that is no joke.

    You know…it is difficult for me these days to even be friends with someone that I know is Republican. It’s a bummer that our country is so divided these days, but I dont see it changing, to be honest.

  2. Sara April 27, 2010 at 07:58 #

    I’m a registered Republican. (Wait, don’t stop reading!) I’m from Louisiana, what do you expect? It’s very, very rare to find a liberal around these parts.

    But I completely agree with you. The Republicans (at least some of them) are being ridiculous. The whole time Bush was in office, all you heard them saying was, “Just because you don’t like him doesn’t mean you shouldn’t respect him. He’s still our President.” And I said that, too. But now that Obama is in office, they’re all singing a different tune. Now they’re doing the exact same thing to him that the liberals did to Bush. Twisting his words around, making stories up about him, finding anything to get angry over. It’s obnoxious.

    I may not have voted for Obama, but I am glad he’s our President. I think he has the best intentions for the country, and he’s doing the best he can. It’s just really annoying to listen to Republicans do the same thing they bitched at everyone else about just four years ago.

    By the way, you should hear how much shit I catch for agreeing with the health care bill. I don’t think it’s perfect, but I definitely think it will help. But don’t come down to Louisiana and say that – you might get the shit beat out of you!

  3. Juliana April 27, 2010 at 09:22 #

    thanks, martin!
    sara… what can i say.. you give me hope.

  4. The Girl Is Goosed April 27, 2010 at 11:07 #

    They say angry-sex is good; that applies to your writing too.

    I try to stay out of the democrat and republican debate simply because I haven’t kept up with the debate (shame). Also because I am scared of how people lash out at you – I’m currently situated in a very conservative (read: republican) state.

    But yes, I am at a shallow point in my life as well and it’s ok. You are a smart person, you know it. That’s what I tell myself now that I have started watching The Girls Next Door and have been frequenting Perez Hilton’s website for the first time in my life.

    I work out for a hot body too more than for life :/ (that’s normal, I think, lol).

  5. Matt April 27, 2010 at 13:10 #

    I like angry posts.

    • Juliana April 27, 2010 at 14:41 #

      OH YEA? WELL, thanks.

      Girl – we forgive you ’cause you’re going to china where you won’t be able to watch that crap anymore. this is like a mildly toxic vacation for your brain.

  6. The Mercurial Wife April 27, 2010 at 15:14 #

    You can write about anything! If your writer’s block spewed out such a wonderful post about derivatives then nothing can stop you. Love reading your posts.

  7. mitya April 27, 2010 at 17:19 #

    hahaha… you followed all of my advice, except for “take a break”. that was the worst writer’s block ever.

    • Juliana April 27, 2010 at 17:24 #

      i don’t know what you’re talking about. who are you?
      i got four books from the library today, including briefer history on CD. i’ll be smarter than you in about 2 weeks.

  8. fallingfromprams April 27, 2010 at 21:41 #

    Excellent post and I feel you on SOOOO many levels here!

  9. Sara April 28, 2010 at 07:52 #

    I gave you a bloggy award on my latest post. Check it out!

  10. Lorna April 28, 2010 at 15:09 #

    u are hilarious!
    a fucking legend.

  11. Sadako April 29, 2010 at 10:33 #

    Sometimes I feel the same, but then I remember what Oscar Wilde said. Only shallow people are truly deep. Or something. And then I don’t feel so bad about trying to maintain my hot little bod or not pretending to get what Stephen Hawking says.

  12. Carly Findlay May 13, 2010 at 08:07 #

    Agreed – an awesome writers block post. You have a special ability to create an awesome blog entry from every day things. I love your blog.

    I am also one who reads entertainment news over serious issues; blogs instead of studies and has a perpetually messy house.

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